A lot of people find me because they are looking for something different. They may have had therapy in the past however found that it stayed too close to the surface or didn’t venture to the deeper parts of their suffering. They may have been struggling for a long time and decided they didn’t want to suffer anymore. They also might want something that is meaningful and deeply personal rather than just strategies and homework. I decided to write this blog to give you a bit of a sense of what it is like to work with me.
I’m not going to tell you what to do or give you homework between sessions. I see my role as working with you in the session to get to know what it’s like to be you and how you make sense of the world. As we understand your experiences on a deeper level you will be able to make the choices that align with the life that you want for yourself. While I am not going to tell you what to do, I will comment on what I notice including inconsistencies in what you might say, patterns I have noticed or what I think might be going on for you at an unconscious or deeper level. You also get to choose what we talk about in sessions and that can be anything that comes to mind when we sit together. Anything at all!
Connecting With Emotions
Sitting with emotions and opening yourself up to how you feel can be difficult and confronting. Because of this a lot of people avoid connecting with their emotions; it makes them feel vulnerable and unsafe. Focusing on emotions gives energy and life to the therapy. It stops being a cold and logical conversation and becomes something that is alive and emerging. I often ask my patients questions like “how does it feel to be talking about this?” or “what emotions are coming up for as you remember this event from the past?” Strong emotions can also be a signpost for something that is not yet processed or known and may need some attention and space for it to emerge.
Looking At Relationships
We are all relational beings and any difficulty we experience becomes woven into our relationships and the connections that we have with others. I am interested in what it feels like for you to be close to others, how your experience other people and how you respond to them. I think that it is important to think about how your symptoms (for example anxiety) impact your relationships and how your relationships impact your symptoms.
I think that healing and growth comes from developing insight and processing experiences. This becomes the focus of sessions where we both endeavour to understand your experiences including what they mean to you, how they have developed and how they might be impacting your life. I think that a lot of symptoms are the manifestation of deeper and more complex parts of a person and by understanding yourself, the symptoms will remit over time.
Focus on OUR relationship
Often we repeated relationship patterns without realising it and this can even happen with your relationship with your therapist. In sessions I will explore and discuss with you what I think is happening between us so that we and start to understand and think about and what it might mean and where it might come from. This developing understanding can then be spread to other relationships and help you make sense of what it is like being close to people.
Want To Know More?
If you are interested in working with or knowing more you can send me an email or give me a call and we can talk about what you are looking for and how I might be able to help. If we decide to meet I will invite you to attend three sessions where you can get to know me and how I work and I can start to understand what you are experiencing and how therapy might be able to help. I hope to hear from you soon!